Lick This!

One of the most stressful parts of Gareth's arrival into the world was varied and sundry advice we received from the lactation specialists (or as one specialist referred to herself, The Boob Lady). Due to some of the complications with birth (low blood sugar), Gareth received formula soon after making his entrance. Introducing him to the bottle made for a tricky transition to feeding au naturale. Every lactation specialist had a different suggestion. One specialist, however, evoked the contempt of both Kathleen and myself. This particular milk quack decided that Gareth needed his frenulum clipped. That's the webby thing that connects your tongue to the bottom of your mouth. Ms. Milk Quack, with her numerous medical degrees (note the sarcasm), suggested, quite fervently, that without a frenulum clip Gareth would never be able to stick his tongue out and successfully breast feed. Apparently, a baby needs to be able to stick her or his tongue out past the bottom lip to feed properly. Whatever. I'm still mystified by the need for a lactation specialist. Haven't humans been breast feeding babies for tens of thousands of years? Gareth, his mother, and I were all a little freaked out by her suggestion. Gareth still gets a little weird when we bring it up.

In case you don't recognize it, that's Gareth's signature "WTF" look.

Thankfully, we told Ms. Milk Quack to get stuffed. As my sister, the speech therapist who specializes in the workings of the mouth & throat, stated, "You don't start messing with the mouth a day after delivery. There's every possibility that his frenulum will turn out to be just fine." Guess what, it did. Ms. Milk Quack will be happy to know that Gareth is quite accomplished at sticking his tongue out. These are directed right at ya, lady.


Look out Gene Simmons!